We must offer a real image of life to children. You are born, you live and you die, and in living there are more flowery and fuller stages, and stages of illness, old age and physical limitations, which our children must also know, although with enough delicacy so as not to cause fear or rejection.
Paulino Castells, author of the novel 'Dear grandparents', talks in his book about how unfortunately we prevent our children from having any approach to pain, suffering and death. We even prevent our children from having a relationship with their grandparents when they suffer from visible and painful illnesses; We try, in order that they do not suffer or be traumatized, to avoid scenes of pain and death. But, according to this author, adults must allow children to enter a cemetery, accompany their loved ones in their last moments and attend their burial.
Grandparents occupy a position of honor in many families, they help in any way they can, enrich the existence of their children and grandchildren, despite their old age or fatigue they never use a 'no' to escape, so, in some way, we We owe them reciprocity when they need us, we must know how to accompany them in moments of pain, reach out to them in their physical limitations and on the deathbed, give them all our love and allow our children to say goodbye to them and prepare for the outcome.
My children do not know this type of grandparents with full physical faculties, who take care of their grandchildren and share games, outings and things with them. For them, their grandparents are wrinkled and calm people who must be cared for and visited, but although apparently they cannot enjoy them physically, they are delighted with the idea of visiting them, asking them strange things or gazing in admiration at that giant scar that grandfather has on one side. These affections and feelings that are aroused in our children are also important to them. Death and pain are an inevitable part of life, and they are not moments for grandparents to live alone, but rather wrapped up in their loved ones.
Teaching our children these less kind aspects of life will enrich their emotions, they will learn to put themselves in the shoes of the weak, to serve and help others, to act calmly, to love selflessly. As the famous prayer of Saint Francis says: 'It is by giving that you receive'.
Patro Gabaldon. Editor of our site
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